


Academic Discourse

by Gunderpants



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Bad Parenting, Blackmail, Book 3: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Epistolary, Gen, Humor, helicopter parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-23
Updated: 2014-10-23
Packaged: 2018-02-22 08:26:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2501165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gunderpants/pseuds/Gunderpants
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>1993: the passive-aggressive wife of a Death Eater harangues the passive-aggressive professor of Defence Against the Dark Arts for a better mark for her son.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Academic Discourse

**Author's Note:**

> Another fic written in 2005. Some bits edited for canon compliance.

September 15, 1993

N Malfoy  
354 Abbotsford Terrace  
WILTSHIRE UK

Mr Lupin,

My son Draco is a student in your third year Defence Against the Dark Arts. He has recently written to me, complaining that you have graded a recent essay significantly lower than it should have been. My son Draco has consistently performed well in his studies, as his Head of House can attest to, and am asking you to reconsider your final grading.

Yours truly,  
Narcissa Malfoy

***

September 16, 1993

RJ Lupin  
c/o Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Dear Mrs Malfoy,

Many thanks for your kind letter concerning your son's academic progress. Your son Draco received a score of 11% on a recent essay on the subject of native Polynesian volcanic demons, a score which I believe does not reflect his true abilities, but more accurately the effort he has given to my class during the course of this school year.

I have offered your son the choice of either resubmitting the essay in a week, where he will receive a new grade, or receiving private tuition, in his own spare time, to help improve his future marks.

If you have any further concerns, please do not hesitate to contact me further.

Yours in good faith,  
Remus Lupin

p.s Please give my kindest regards to your sister, Andromeda, and her family.

***

September 17, 1993

N Malfoy  
354 Abbotsford Terrace  
WILTSHIRE UK

Mr Lupin,

My son was most disappointed that you would be so unreasonable as to not reconsider the mark you gave his recent essay. From what I have heard from a dear family friend and colleague of yours, this unreasonable attitude can only be expected. Never before have I seen such unprofessional behaviour from an educator, and I am astounded that the Board of Governors (one of whom being my husband, Lucius) would allow someone with your lack of experience and empathy for children to teach at Hogwarts. I strongly urge you to adjust my son's mark, and keep your personal bias against our family's soceoeconomic status out of your marking.

Yours,

Narcissa Malfoy

***

September 18, 1993

RJ Lupin  
c/o Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Dear Mrs Malfoy,

I thank you kindly for your many observations about my teaching ability and integrity within the pedagogical system. I do not know my colleague's qualifications, however I cannot say that he is not a sufficient educator and potion's master.

To help you comprehend your son's seemingly low mark, I have taken the liberty of providing you with an itemised list of example problems found with your son's recent paper.

*Your son spelled 'defence' as 'difense' in the heading of his paper.

*The length I requested from all students in my class was three feet of parchment; a reasonable length for an assignment with a two week deadline. Your son managed to fill out one foot with extremely large handwriting.

*The topic, as I may have mentioned in an earlier letter, was Polynesian volcano demons and spirits. Draco somehow managed to write a rather lengthy discourse about people being sucked into volcanoes, often digressing into spirited, incorrectly capitalised exclamations of 'SCREW MUDBLOODS'.

*In the four hundred words your son submitted, I counted at least eighty spelling and grammatical errors. Indeed, I found that my name had been incorrectly spelled on his cover page.

*I believe that your son wrote this essay (for lack of a better word) in either human blood or very concentrated red cordial, and on the day of submission, I noted young Master Longbottom to look rather anaemic indeed.

*He confused 'Polynesia' with 'Skegness'. My speciality is not in geography, though I am unaware that Skegness lay on a particularly active tectonic fault.

Indeed, in an attempt to gain an outsider's opinion, I showed your son's paper to three of my senior colleagues, one of whom yelled at me because she thought I made it up as a joke. When she found out that it was, indeed, a third year paper, she simply sat down at her desk and polished off an entire container of biscuits. All three of my fellow teachers agreed that the mark I had given your son was both fair, reasonable and accurate, given the lack of effort and quality evident.

I do not wish to imply through this letter that your son Draco is of subnormal intelligence. I believe Draco is a most capable young man who simply chooses not to work to his potential, and should he give the same level of effort to my class as he does to his Seeker duties in Quidditch, he would be capable of a good mark.

I additionally would like to raise my concerns about your son's conduct within my classes. Though I have heard minimal complaint from colleagues, your son's behaviour around me is disrespectful and disruptive to the class environment.

If you have any further concerns, please do not hesitate to contact me further.

Yours truly,  
RJ Lupin

ps. I am under the impression that your husband is no longer on the board of school governors. Please feel free to correct me if I am labouring under a false apprehension.

***

September 19, 1993

N Malfoy  
354 Abbotsford Terrace  
WILTSHIRE UK

Mr Lupin,

In an attempt to correct the injustice against my son, I have asked that a copy of his essay be forwarded to Mr Rodney Shrewdly, the Chairman on the Board of Directors, to fairly adjudicate the harsh mark. I have also heard many negative comments from fellow parents at Hogwarts about your teaching methods, many of whom are prominent members of the community.

Yours,  
Narcissa Malfoy

***

September 20, 1993

RJ Lupin  
c/o Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Dear Mrs Malfoy,

I was approached by a rather harangued looking Mr Shrewdly whilst marking second year tests this afternoon. Mr Shrewdly is in concurrence with the mark I gave your son, and indeed suggested that I may have been overly generous. He requests that you stop owling his place of residence or he may be forced to consider legal action.

Additionally, if the prominent families you speak of are the Goyles, the Parkinsons and the Greengrass', it is only fair to comment that the quality of their children's assessments are similar to that of your son's. Indeed, I can recall that in addition to misspelling my own name, Gregory Goyle somehow managed to misspell his own.

Yours truly,  
RJ Lupin

***

September 21, 1993

N Malfoy  
354 Abbotsford Terrace  
WILTSHIRE, UK

Mr Lupin,

You are being completely unreasonable! You are victimising my poor son! I will definitely be speaking to the Headmaster about your unprofessional behaviour and lack of compassion.

NM

***

September 23, 1993

RJ Lupin  
c/o Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Dear Mrs Malfoy,

Good.

Yours truly,

RJ Lupin.

ps. The Headmaster also requests that you leave him alone. He is a very busy man with a very bad headache and an office crammed full of easily (and noisily) broken objects precariously positioned on low desks.

***

September 24, 1993

N Malfoy  
354 Abbotsford Terrace  
WILTSHIRE, UK

Dear Mr Lupin,

I was recently having dinner with a dear friend of the family who works within the department of Control of Magical Creatures when I was alarmed to learn of your condition. I send you my deepest sympathies. It must be incredibly difficult to try teaching our young, defenceless children whilst you manage such a dangerous, uncontrollable affliction. It must also be incredibly difficult to discuss with people, as I imagine that many Hogwarts parents must feel incredibly uncomfortable with someone of your particular kind dealing with their families. I would certainly not like to think of what could happen if this information were shared with the general public.

Additionally, how is my son Draco progressing in his classwork? I do hope you are still reconsidering your earlier mark of his volcanic demons assignment.

Yours cordially,  
Narcissa Malfoy

***

September 25, 1993

RJ Lupin  
c/o Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Mrs Malfoy;

In the event that you are unaware of McIlhaney v. Fletcher, 1932, I am forced to remind you that persons who illegally access confidential information as contained within the Department of Magical Beasts, as mine is thus classified by the Wizengamot, are liable for sentencing to no less than fifteen years in Azkaban, and/or a fine of three thousand galleons. This ruling applies to not only the person who accesses the information, but the persons to whom it is given. I would be at loathe to think that a friend or relative of yours could be in danger of such a heinous breach of the Magical Privacy and Confidentiality Act. I have also heard that the punishment of those Ministry officials who illegally provide such information to the general public is raised by a further two year confinement in Azkaban and a permanent barring from employment within the Ministry of Magic.

You are asking me to disregard all pedagogical morals and ethics in the pursuit of giving your son a grade which he does not deserve. I strongly urge you, for the remaining shred of integrity of your family, to encourage your son to see me for private tuition in the hope of improving his Defence against the Dark Arts marks. In the event that your son does approach me for additional tuition and makes a concerted effort at raising his marks, I will not report the illegal acquisition of classified information to the appropriate authorities.

Yours,  
RJL.

***

September 30, 1993

RJ Lupin  
c/o Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Dear Mrs Malfoy;

Many thanks for encouraging your son Draco to attend private tuition with myself. He has shown a marked increase in the quality of his work. He is applying himself more consistently to his prep, and this is evident in his class work. I am pleased to inform you that your son's most recent paper has improved from 11% to 42%, which is the lowest mark I concede a pass to. I still believe, however, that Draco's attitude in class and his respect for fellow students and his teachers needs improvement, and that a change in attitude and attention to his classes may improve his marks further.

Yours faithfully,  
RJ Lupin


End file.
